


drive until you lose the road

by Kazutoes



Category: Mach GoGoGo | Speed Racer, Speed Racer: The Next Generation (Cartoon)
Genre: Happy ending don't worry, M/M, Season 2 spoilers, angsty as all hell, anyway i love these two, speed you need to communicate more!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:55:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26231515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kazutoes/pseuds/Kazutoes
Summary: He only had one shot to do this. It wasn't like anyone but him would remember, right? Unfortunately for him, though, things don't work out as much as he'd like...
Relationships: Speed Racer Jr./Connor
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	drive until you lose the road

**Author's Note:**

  * For [N_Chu4Ever](https://archiveofourown.org/users/N_Chu4Ever/gifts).



> ANYWAY I LOVE THEM SO MUCH  
> I was watching an episode and I had my speed/connor hat on and I was like, hm... Speeds impulsive.. and It would be the perfect chance to have him do something stupid...
> 
> anyway yeah this is angsty for like. nO REASON Im sorry

If there was any time to do it, it would be now.

It wasn't like Connor was going to remember this if it did go wrong. Sure, he'd remember it and he'd pining sadly for the rest of his life. But it was better than losing the friendship he had in the real timeline.

X and Lucy were busy barricading the door with the Coffee o' Matic, the war between the Pirates and Vikings raging on outside. Connor was off recording the DVD he'd be giving to past Connor. And here he was, leaning against the Mach 6 and weighing the pros and cons of kissing his best friend before jumping into a vortex. Crazy how life worked out like that.

"We can't hold them much longer!" X shouts, his grip slipping against the large machine. He immediately snaps to action and runs over to Connor, who was about to end his spiel about quantum mechanics and stuff he didn't understand.

To be honest, his heart was pounding. He could _choose_ to not do this, but at the same time, he'd be losing the one-shot he got. And he was all about taking risks.

Only this time, this one would only affect him.

"Connor, we have to get going," He says, urgency heavy in his voice. The Mach 6 was at 60% jump charge and gaining, but if they wait even a minute longer… there wouldn't be enough time, no matter how fast he drove.

"Bye Future me!" Connor waves before hitting a button, the recording ending and a DVD popping out of its slot. He immediately removes it and grabs his helmet, heading for the Mach 6.

"Wait-" He murmurs, turning around to find Connor typing something in. It was now or never. And it was now.

As he places his helmet and DVD onto the console, he couldn't help but murmur a quiet _"Please don't hate me…"_ He gently turns Connor towards him and pulls him into a kiss, putting the most love and respect as he could into it.

His heart stops when he realizes Connor wasn't kissing him back, and he quickly pulls away to find almost a.. disgusted look on his face. He stepped away as his eyes widen, giving countless apologies.

"I'm so sorry," He says before turning away, his heart breaking to the _crack_ of lightning outside. He had to get out of here and _fast._

X looks at him with a melancholy face as he got into the Mach 6. He couldn't help but feel horrible. As much as he didn't want to think it, if this Connor didn't like him back, then…

The one in the past wouldn't.

The garage opens as he turns over the ignition, the familiar rumble of the engine somewhat soothing him. Both X and Lucy cleared away from his path as he tore away from the garage, dead set on heading to the big vortex in the sky.

At least he knew now that his feelings aren't reciprocated. That meant he didn't have to risk their friendship in the old timeline. Everything would just go back to normal.

Then why the hell did it hurt so bad?

As he nears the vortex his comm system turns on, showing both X and Lucy. They had bittersweet smiles on their faces, X doing a mock salute.

"See ya on the other side, lil bro."

"Be safe out there! Make sure Connor doesn't cause another dinosaur to appear!"

He can't help but laugh, even though he felt like he was going to cry. "I won't. See you, guys."

The hurt grew stronger as he realizes Connor wasn't around to wish him goodbye. He couldn't help but realize that maybe he deserved it.

The comm system turns off and he's left alone with his thoughts as he speeds towards the vortex, the jump feature finally charged up.

This was it. The end of this shitty day, the end of this timeline.

And he couldn't be more glad it was over.

\---

Back at the garage, Connor freaks out heavily.

"I screwed up so bad, I-I didn't know how to react and he looked so upset and now the other Connor will never know and it's all my fault-" He yells, running his gloved hands through his ginger hair. Even X looked like he felt bad for him.

"Hey, don't say that. Maybe things work out differently in the past?" She tries to calm him down, even though it was fruitless. They were going to cease to exist anyway. It was actually sort of surprising how little she cared.

But that didn't mean Connor deserved to spend his last moments upset over something he can't change.

"You don't know that!" He replies, his bright green eyes wide as the moon. "Other me is an idiot, I'd never confess…"

X shrugs. "I have a feeling that things will work out. Don't worry about it, man."

Connor can't help but sob as Lucy wraps her arms around him, all of them listening to the roar of the Mach 6 as it jumps through the vortex.

" _Please… I love you, don't give up…"_

\----

As he jumps into the vortex, he hits the jump button and the world fades away around him as he nearly blacks out. He almost wishes he did.

Within a moment he was back into the garage again, most likely replacing the previous Mach 6 that was there.

And there Connor was, chatting with Chim-Chim over the new hourglass. Tears come unbidden to his eyes as he steps out of the Mach 6, disk in hand.

"Speed! Where'd you-" He tries to ask, before his tone shifts when he sees Speed near tears. "What's wrong?"

He didn't want Connor to see this. Not after what he just did.

"You'd hate me for it," He murmurs as he slams the DVD onto the desk, walking out of the garage. His helmet felt suffocating as he rips it off, slowly breaking down.

He wishes he'd never done anything. He would've been better off not knowing then dealing with this.

The night felt even colder as he walked away from the garage- from Connor.

"Speed! What's wrong!"

Connor runs up to him as he tries to walk faster, wiping away tears that just kept calling. He didn't want to do this, not right now. All he wanted was to curl up in bed and sleep for a million years.

"God- you don't want to know, okay! It's stupid!" He shouts, his voice cracking rather pathetically. For the first time in a while, he wishes Connor would just leave him alone.

He can feel himself being turned around by Connor's surprisingly strong hands, covering his face to hide the tears. It didn't work.

"It's not stupid if you're crying like this, what's going on?"

A cold breeze blows by them as they stand out in the dark, the only light they had were the streetlights illuminating their faces. He couldn't stand the way Connor was looking up to him, so expectant, so _trusting.._ he felt like he was betraying that just by looking at him.

"Fuck, I-" He breathed out. There was no sense hiding it now, was there? He could never hide anything from his best friend, not since the beginning of their friendship.

With a small voice, he quietly rushes out "I-I did something dumb, and you looked so disgusted and you hated me for it and i can't go through that again, I won't-"

A warm hand grabs his shaking one as he looks away, hoping that maybe, just maybe Connor would just drop it. Go back inside.

He doesn't.

And Connor whispers back, almost a silent "What did you do?"

A single moment passes before he finally says it.

"I made the mistake of showing you that I loved you."

He flinches as he says it, his breath caught in his chest. Even if Connor did react badly, he could just say that he asked for it. That he was willing to not tell him.

To his surprise, however, Connor _laughs_. He can feel a pair of arms wrap around his torso, and the whisper of a "God, you idiot," It takes a moment before he can feel a pair of lips on his, and he melts.

He can't help but pull Connor close to him as he tangles a hand in his best friend's hair— well, probably more now after this, savoring the feeling. Their heartbeats seemed to sync up as they stood there, warmth penetrating their bones.

They break away after a few moments, breathing heavily. Connor lifts a hand to wipe away the remaining tears, smiling as he did so.

"Something tells me another me screwed up amazingly."

He shakes his head. "No… we were on a time limit, I didn't stop to ask... I just did."

Connor snorts fondly. "Sounds like something you'd do."

Speed smiles back. "I don't think you'd expect anything else."

The night stars twinkle above them as they came together again for another kiss, this time knowing that maybe, just maybe… things would be alright.


End file.
